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 I am Kristen and this is my story

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Posts : 2
Join date : 2012-10-15

PostSubject: I am Kristen and this is my story   Wed Oct 17, 2012 11:10 pm

I figure since I started this I should be the one that starts the topics.
I have been dealing with infertility for over 6 years. I knew before I married my husband we were going to have problems getting pregnant because I had never had a "normal" cycle. We got married in 2006 and decided that we would start trying right away. When nothing happened for a full year I knew we had to see someone. We went to a prominent fertility group in NE Ohio only to have the doctor say to me that he did not want to treat me until I lost weight and to do that I should have gastric bypass surgery. I became incredibly irrate and stormed out of the office not caring what else he had to say.
We stopped "trying". I threw myself into everything else: work, video games (yes, I am a gamer), cooking, reading, basically anything that kept my mind off of babies. None of that worked of course. Especially when my younger brother and his now wife told my parents they were worried about telling me that they were going to have a baby because they didn't want me to be upset. OOOPS! That happened anyway. I became increasingly depressed. At that point, 3 years had gone by since we last saw a fertility doctor and nothing happened.
My niece was born and through some crazy twist of fate my brother and his wife and the baby came to live with us for a few months. I had this absolutely beautiful baby girl in my house and she wasn't mine. I hated how I felt and told my husband I wanted to start looking into other options be it other doctors or adoption. I made the call to a new doctor who everyone warned me about his bedside manner. He can be a bit straight forward, gruff, seemingly rude. However, he is the most honest doctor, genuinely caring (without showing too much) specialist I have ever met.
We were told we most likely wouldn't have to do IVF. He told me I have a mild case of PCOS which was causing other problems. I also have this blood clotting disorder that I can't, for the life of me, remember but it won't kill me right now so I'm ok. My husband and I started treatments in July of 2011. With the first 2 iui's I did not get pregnant. Financially we had screwed ourselves earlier in the year so we were forced to wait until 2012 to start trying again. In January 2012, I had to have tests done which stopped our treatments. February we did 2 iui's with no luck. Due to the way my cycles fell and the short month we technically skipped March and I had the 1 iui I was willing to do on April 1st. At that point I wanted a break. The hormones are viscious. Each cycle we are doing any sort of treatment or we are trying I take 200mg vaginal suppositories of Progesterone, 14 days of estrogen supplements by patch and then whatever meds the doctor has decided to hit me with. Sometimes I will receive the HCG trigger shot and those are the worst months. In April, something worked. I found out on Friday the 13th that I was pregnant for the first time ever in my life with our first baby. We went through the roof. We told everyone. I felt that this was ridiculous but Jeremy couldn't keep his mouth shut. We went to appointments every week for the first 8 weeks. The doctor warned me at one point that I may lose the baby because my hcg levels weren't rising fast enough. Then we had a very slow heart beat which got faster to the point where it was perfect. When I was 8 weeks pregnant the doctor said to me "The only way you will lose this pregnancy now is if there is a chromosome abnormality or a genetics issue." I was ridiculously hopeful that this baby was fine. We had to wait 2 weeks until our next appointment. 4 days before my 10 week appointment something, I am not sure what exactly, but something happened and I knew the baby was gone. On May 29th, it was confirmed that our baby had lost his heartbeat. I had to have a d&c and sunk into a horrible depression that I never thought would end. About a month later I decided I wanted to try again right away but we were forced not to because my hormone levels were not dropping. it too from June until the end of August for it to be safe for us to try again.
Finally, we are actively trying to have our 1st living baby again. We are going to continue with the iui's and eventually move from taking Letrozole (in place of clomid) to taking daily shots. Those cycles will cost us over $3000 a month.

I feel for you ladies and can't wait to hear your stories so we can be a strong support system for each other.
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